Tārof When Welcoming Guests

Leyla: Hello and welcome to Lesson 66 of Learn Persian with Chai and Conversation! We're doing our dialogue series today, and I'm joined by my colleague Vijay. salām vijay jān!

Vijay: salām leylā jãn, hāletoon chetor-é?

Leyla: khaylee mamnoon, khoob-am. shomā chetor-een? 

Vijay: man ham khoob-am. salām bé rooyé māhet! 

Leyla: Well, amazing, Vijay is putting us in the mood of tārof! “salām bé rooyé māhet” is a very common expression. Vijay, do you want to explain it? 

Vijay: Yeah, it was an expression that we saw in, I think, our second lesson from the ones that we just recorded. It just basically means ‘nice to see you’, but it's literally ‘hello to your moon-like face’!

Leyla: That's right. And it's a common expression. You can use it among friends, as Vijay just did. We're here today, I want to point out, with our chāis. Hopefully, you all have your chāi ready to listen to this lesson as well! The point of these lessons is that you can be drinking one cup of chāi and listen to the entire lesson. They're short and sweet and good for a chāi break, but if we want to give a little preface to today's lesson, Vijay…? 

Vijay: Sure, absolutely! In our last lesson, we had a dialogue that was all tārof. In this one, we have another dialogue that's almost all tārof but even longer, so we have even more tārof than we had in the last dialogue. 

Leyla: Okay, good, and it's not an exaggeration because Iranians could have a five to ten-minute conversation just using tārof back and forth!

Vijay: Absolutely, and in this case, it's inviting guests to your house. That's a very, very classic situation for using tārof. 

Leyla: Wow! Okay, but thankfully for us, it's only 32 seconds long, so we just get a taste of it. Okay, without any further, let's go ahead and listen to the entire conversation at 0.75x speed. 

Mr. Shibani: salām, khosh āmadeen, safā ovordeen.

Mr. Moravati: salām, hāletoon chetor-é?

Mr. Shibani: khoob-am, shomā chetor-een? 

Mrs. Moravati: khaylee mamnoon. khoob-eem, bé lotfetoon. 

Mr. Shibani: befarmāyeed, befarmāyeed too. vāgh'an eftekhār dādeen tashreef ovordeen.

Mr. Moravati: ekhteeyār dāreen.

Mr. Shibani: befarmāyeed tooyé otāghé nesheeman. har jā rāhat-een besheeneen. manzelé khodetoon-é.

Mrs. Moravati: khaylee mamnoon, lotf dāreen. hameenjā rāhat-eem. khānom tashreef nadāran?

Mr. Shibani: cherā! seemeen alān meeyād khedmatetoon… seemeen, beeyā āghā vō khānomé moravati tashreef ovordan!

Leyla: Okay! Wonderful. So this might sound a little fast to you. It might have a lot of unfamiliar words, but hopefully by the end of this lesson, we will get it all down. So, as we always do with these lessons, let's just start from the first sentence, listen to it again, and repeat it at a slower pace so that we can understand, along with the translation. 

āghāyé shibāni: salām, khosh āmadeen, safā ovordeen. 

Leyla: Okay! So this first sentence, Vijay, if you want to say the Persian and I'll translate it. 

Vijay: Sure. salām, khosh āmadeen, safā ovordeen. 

Leyla: Okay, so this is a scenario in which someone is at their house and some guests come over. So the first thing that the guy says when he opens the door is salãm 

Vijay: salãm 

Leyla: Which, of course, we know means hello. So yes, again, I’m going to say it, and as Vijay just did, he's going to repeat it. salām 

Vijay: salām

Leyla: And then, khosh āmadeen 

Vijay: khosh āmadeen

Leyla: So this literally means you have come in a good spirit. So you're welcome. So exactly the same as welcome. khosh means happy or well, and āmadeen means you have come. So khosh āmadeen 

Vijay: khosh āmadeen 

Leyla: And this is a very common thing to say when someone enters your house. You're saying welcome, welcome. Hello! Welcome. So salām, khosh āmadeen. 

Vijay: salām, khosh āmadeen 

Leyla: And then he says something that we might not have heard before. And that is safā ovordeen 

Vijay:  safā ovordeen 

Leyla: And that is another way to say welcome. But literally, safā means something along the lines of purity or cleanliness or a breath of fresh air you can think of it. So safā ovordeen. So you've brought with you a breath of fresh air. You can think of it that way. safā ovordeen 

Vijay: safā ovordeen 

Leyla: Okay, so we have two verbs here that are good to know. One is āmadeen, which is you have come, and this is in the formal sense. So āmadeen 

Vijay: āmadeen 

Leyla: And the other one is you have brought ovordeen 

Vijay: ovordeen 

Leyla: And so these are two formal verbs. So he's speaking to them in a formal way. But also there's two of them who have come. So either he's addressing both of them or speaking formally or both. So again, let's repeat this whole sentence once again. salām 

Vijay: salām 

Leyla: khosh āmadeen 

Vijay: khosh āmadeen 

Leyla: safā ovordeen 

Vijay: safā ovordeen 

Leyla: Which is a really beautiful way to greet someone coming to your house.Okay, next sentence. 

āghāyé moravati: salām, hāletoon chetor-é? 

Leyla: And here we had a little overlapping, the man and woman at the same time say salām. 

Vijay: salām 

Leyla: Which again is hello. And the man asks hāletoon chetor-é? 

Vijay:   hāletoon chetor-é? 

Leyla: And so here we get another clue. We see that the guy who has come to the house is also using the formal you. So, hāletoon chetor-é? How are you? But in the formal way. hāletoon chetor-é? 

Vijay: hāletoon chetor-é? 

Leyla: How are you? hāl is your state of being. So, how is your state of being right now? How are you doing? And the way we would ask this in an informal way is hālet chetor-é? 

Vijay: hālet chetor-é? 

Leyla: But he says hāletoon chetor-é? 

Vijay: hāletoon chetor-é? 

Leyla: Okay. And let's see what he answers back. 

āghāyé shibāni: khoob-am, shomā chetor-een? 

Leyla: Okay. So he answers back khoob-am, shomā chetor-een? 

Vijay: khoob-am, shomā chetor-een? 

Leyla: So first he answers khoob-am, I am well. khoob-am 

Vijay: khoob-am 

Leyla: And then he goes shomā chetor-een? Which again is the formal way of asking, how are you? So, shomā chetor-een? 

Vijay:  shomā chetor-een? 

Leyla: And this is kind of interesting because he's not saying, he's not repeating the same hāletoon chetor-é? He's not saying. He's saying how, and you, how are you doing? So he's switching it around a little bit, and he's emphasizing shomā, and you? shomā chetor-een? How are you? shomā chetor-een? 

Vijay: shomā chetor-een? 

Leyla: Wonderful. Any observations up to this point, Vijay? It's all pretty simple. 

Vijay: No, not really. I mean, safā ovordeen is really our new phrase here. And it's just, you know, kind of warming us up to see a lot of tārof in this dialogue. And we have, you know, the same expressions that we saw for the last dialogue, you know, the eftekhār dādeen, ekhteeyār dāreen, you know, we have all of that featuring in this dialogue, so we'll just see more of it. 

Leyla: Okay. So let's listen to the next sentence. 

khānomé moravati: khaylee mamnoon. khoob-eem, bé lotfetoon. 

Leyla: Oh, another tārof, another big tārof. She goes khaylee mamnoon. And this means thank you very much. khaylee is very much, and mamnoon is thank you, so khaylee mamnoon. 

Vijay: khaylee mamnoon

Leyla:  And she goes, khoob-eem 

Vijay: khoob-eem 

Leyla: Which means we are good. khoob-eem 

Vijay: khoob-eem. 

Leyla: So khaylee mamnoon. khoob-eem. Thank you, we're good. khaylee mamnoon. khoob-eem 

Vijay: khaylee mamnoon. khoob-eem 

Leyla: And then she says bé lotfetoon 

Vijay: bé lotfetoon

Leyla: This is another tārof phrase that we have. And this means thank you. Thanks to you. It's kind of a tārof phrase like we said before, but lotfetoon means by your grace. 

Vijay: Like generosity or. Yeah. 

Leyla: Yes. Due to your generosity, we're doing good. Which, of course, is a tārof phrase. So bé lotfetoon 

Vijay: bé lotfetoon 

Leyla: And, yes, thanks to you is a good way to say it. bé lotfetoon Because of your kindness, we are doing good. So again, the whole phrase is khaylee mamnoon

Vijay:  khaylee mamnoon 

Leyla: khoob-eem, bé lotfetoon.

Vijay: khoob-eem, bé lotfetoon. 

Leyla: Wonderful. Next 

āghāyé shibāni: befarmāyeed, befarmāyeed too. vāgh'an eftekhār dādeen tashreef ovordeen. 

Leyla: And I think we've heard this before in another one of our tārof lessons in this series. But he says befarmāyeed, befarmāyeed too. And this is one of the most important tārof phrases that we could use. It's used very, very often, but befarmāyeed, is please, go ahead. So that's something that we use very often. In this case, he's asking them to come in. So he goes befarmāyeed, befarmāyeed too. He repeats it twice, and too means inside. So please, please come inside. So again, befarmāyeed

Vijay: befarmāyeed 

Leyla: befarmāyeed too 

Vijay: befarmāyeed too 

Leyla: And we use this for go ahead. And it's used very, very often. So, for example, if you're stuck at a door and you want someone else to go, in you go, befarmāyeed 

Vijay: befarmāyeed 

Leyla: Or if you've brought tea to someone and you want them to grab it you say befarmāyeed 

Vijay: befarmāyeed

Leyla: So, please grab the tea. So this is very often used. So again befarmāyeed, befarmāyeed too 

Vijay: befarmāyeed, befarmāyeed too 

Leyla: And then he goes vāgh'an eftekhār dādeen tashreef ovordeen. And all of this just means you've really brought pride, that you have come graced us with your presence. You have come to our home. So let's break this down. vāgh'an means really vāgh'an 

Vijay: vāgh'an 

Leyla: And then eftekhār dādeen

Vijay: eftekhār dādeen 

Leyla: So eftekhār dādeen. So you have given pride. dādeen means to give, eftekhār is pride. So eftekhār dādeen 

Vijay: eftekhār dādeen 

Leyla: And we've had the phrase tashreef ovordeen before, and it means you have basically graced us with your presence, you have come to this place. tashreef ovordeen 

Vijay: tashreef ovordeen 

Leyla: Okay, so two in a row there of tārofing. So eftekhār dādeen, you have brought pride, and then tashreef ovordeen, you have come with your presence. You've graced us with your presence. Vijay, any other observations that you want to make before we move on? 

Vijay: Not really, I think it's just bé lotfetoon is, you know, one of those. I think a lot of these expressions are things that don't really translate literally into English. So we've taken a few liberties in translating it, just so that it sounds a little bit more like it makes sense in English. Yeah! So the translation is a little loose, I'd just bear that in mind. 

Leyla: Yes. And the next sentence is a good example of that. Let's listen to it. 

āghāyé moravati: ekhteeyār dāreen 

Leyla: Okay. So he goes ekhteeyār dāreen 

Vijay: ekhteeyār dāreen

Leyla: And this is super important. When you're seeing Iranians and they're just tārofing and tārofing and saying all this stuff like you've brought pride, you've brought purity, you've brought this, your job is to be like, no, no, no, I'm just a simple human. I've done nothing. And that's what this sentence does. It tones down their tārof. So you go ekhteeyār dāreen 

Vijay: ekhteeyār dāreen

Leyla: So, this doesn't, you can't really literally translate it, but it basically means no, you're. That's not true. Please. So ekhteeyār dāreen 

Vijay: ekhteeyār dāreen 

Leyla: And it kind of offsets that major tārof that that guy was doing. Okay! Next sentence 

āghāyé shibāni: befarmāyeed tooyé otāghé nesheeman. har jā rāhateen besheeneen. manzelé khodetoon-é. 

Leyla: Okay! So that was really fast. A lot of stuff there. So let's break it down slowly. So he goes befarmāyeed tooyé otāghé nesheeman. So let's go over the words we do know already. So otāgh is the word for room. And nesheeman literally means to sit. otāghé nesheeman means the room of sitting otāghé nesheeman 

Vijay: otāghé nesheeman 

Leyla: otāghé Nesheeman

Vijay: otāghé nesheeman 

Leyla: Perfect, and that is the sitting room. So literally, the living room or, yeah, sitting room is also a word that we use in English. And then too means inside. too 

Vijay: too 

Leyla: So tooyé, inside of, otāghé nesheeman is the sitting room, inside of the sitting room. tooyé otāghé nesheeman

Vijay: tooyé otāghé nesheeman 

Leyla: And we've explained that concept of ezafé before, that é sound. But recently I read that you can think of it as ‘of’, and that's really changed the way I see it. So again, you can translate this as inside of the room of sitting. So that's a nice way to translate into English. So tooyé otāghé nesheeman

Vijay: tooyé otāghé nesheeman

Leyla: And of course, we have that word befarmāyeed again. Please come in. Please, please go. Befarmāyeed

Vijay: Befarmāyeed

Leyla: So, please go ahead to the inside of the sitting room. befarmāyeed tooyé otāghé nesheeman

Vijay: befarmāyeed tooyé otāghé nesheeman 

Leyla: Okay, then har jā rāhateen besheeneen. So jā is the word for place, and har means any. So har jā 

Vijay: har jā 

Leyla: rāhateen And then rāhat budan means to be comfortable. So rāhateen. Anywhere you are comfortable. rāhateen 

Vijay: rāhateen 

Leyla: And he's continuing using the formal phrase. So I guess that these are, you know, Iranian culture tends to be more formal than other cultures. So you would use the formal more often than not. But these are not like best best friends. These are just people visiting his house. So har jā rāhateen besheeneen. 

Vijay: har jā rāhateen besheeneen. 

Leyla: And then this next phrase again is a great tārof phrase. And that is manzelé khodetoon-é. 

Vijay: manzelé khodetoon-é. 

Leyla: Great, and manzel is a formal word that means your abode, your place of living, your house. We don't really have a direct translation in English, again, your, it was just on the tip of my tongue, but something like your manor, this is your place. So manzelé khodetoon-é is very similar to mi casa es su casa. It’s saying it is your house. manzelé khodetoon-é 

Vijay: manzelé khodetoon-é 

Leyla: So it is, khod means self. And khodetoon-é means it is yours. Like so this is your house. You could also say khoonéyé khodetoon-é. 

Vijay: khoonéyé khodetoon-é. 

Leyla: It's your house. So he's saying sit anywhere you're comfortable. It's your own house. Just imagine that it's your own house. Again, this is a big tārof phrase. When someone comes to your house, you want them to be very comfortable. So he says, suppose this is your own house. Sit anywhere you want. So again, manzelé khodetoon-é. 

Vijay: manzelé khodetoon-é. 

Leyla: Okay, great. And let's repeat all of these together befarmāyeed tooyé otāghé nesheeman. 

Vijay: befarmāyeed tooyé otāghé nesheeman. 

Leyla: Great. har jā rāhateen besheeneen 

Vijay: har jā rāhateen besheeneen 

Leyla: manzelé khodetoon-é 

Vijay: manzelé khodetoon-é 

Leyla: Perfect. Okay, let's listen to the next line. 

khānomé moravati: khaylee mamnoon, lotf dāreen. hameenjā rāhat-eem. khānom tashreef nadāran? 

Leyla: Okay! So she goes. khaylee mamnoon, lotf dāreen. 

Vijay: khaylee mamnoon, lotf dāreen. 

Leyla: Which we've gone through all of these before. khaylee mamnoon means thank you very much. khaylee mamnoon 

Vijay: khaylee mamnoon 

Leyla: And before she said bé lotfetoon. So what was that? Do you remember what that meant?

Vijay:  So that means, like, thank you for asking. 

Leyla: It's like, thanks to you. Thanks to you. So then in this case, when she says lotf dāreen it means you have, like. 

Vijay: You’re too kind. 

Leyla: You're too kind. You have kindness. Exactly. You have like bestowed this kindness. So lotf dāreen

Vijay: lotf dāreen 

Leyla: So before bé lotfetoon meant thanks to your kindness. And in this case, she says you have kindness. lotf dāreen 

Vijay: lotf dāreen 

Leyla: Great. And then she goes, hameenjā rāhat-eem. So he had asked har jā rāhateen besheeneen. Sit wherever you're comfortable. And then she goes hameen jā. So jā, again, means place. jā 

Vijay: jā 

Leyla: And hameen means exactly here. So hameenjā 

Vijay: hameenjā. 

Leyla: And to break it down a little bit, ham is a really important word in Persian language. ham means same or equal or this. And then een means this. So she's saying just this place. Also, this same place that I'm sitting. 

Vijay: hameenjā hameenjā 

Leyla: Great. And then she goes rāhat-eem rāhat again means to be comfortable, and we are comfortable. hameenjā, we too. rāhat-eem, 

Vijay: rāhat-eem rāhat-eem 

Leyla: So again hameenjā rāhat-eem. 

Vijay: hameenjā rāhat-eem. 

Leyla: And then she gets a little uncomfortable. She slows down a little and she goes, khānom tashreef nadāran? And so khānom means lady. So your lady, like your wife khānom 

Vijay: khānom 

Leyla: And this next part is another tārof phrase. And that's tashreef nadāran? 

Vijay: tashreef nadāran? 

Leyla: And this is when you want to be very formal, like tashreef ovordeen, before he said, it means you graced us with your presence. You brought, you brought pride here, tashreef ovordeen. So she says tashreef nadāran, so she is not present? tashreef nadāran?

Vijay: tashreef nadāran? 

Leyla: And again, this is another clue that they are very formal. So she's not saying khānom neest? Like, she's not here? She's not? She's using a lot more words than she needs to to say the same thing. Like she's not here, but tashreef nadāran? She has not graced us with her presence? tashreef nadāran? 

Vijay: tashreef nadāran? 

Leyla: And she could’ve, she could say nadāré if they're less formal, even if she still wants to be like tārofy, she could say tashreef nadāré? But these are people that are not very good friends. And she's using really respectful or they're a lot younger or something. So tashreef nadāran? 

Vijay: tashreef nadāran? 

Leyla: And also, she's not using the woman's name. She's just saying the wife is not here? So that's another layer of, you know, distance that she's putting herself between herself and the lady of the house. So the lady of the house is not present? Hasn’t graced us with her presence? Okay! And then he answers. 

āghāyé shibāni: cherā! seemeen alān meeyād khedmatetoon… seemeen, beeyā āghā vō khānomé moravati tashreef ovordan! 

Leyla: Okay, so there's a couple of interesting things about this. So he goes, cherā! 

Vijay: cherā! 

Leyla: And this is when you answer a negative question and you want to answer with a positive. You say cherā! 

Vijay: cherā! 

Leyla: So it means yes, but in response to a negative. So, oh, she's not here. Oh yes, she is here. cherā! 

Vijay: cherā! 

Leyla: And then he calls her by her first name. seemeen, her name is Simin, alān meeyād khedmatetoon. And again, this is another formal phrase, but he's using informal with his wife because it's his wife, and he's informal with her. So he goes seemeen alān, right now, alān 

Vijay: alān 

Leyla: And then meeyād khedmatetoon 

Vijay: meeyād khedmatetoon 

Leyla: Okay! And that means she will come to be of service to you. khedmatetoon means to your service. So meeyād, she will come to be in your service. Khedmatetoon

Vijay: Khedmatetoon

Leyla: And this is a formal way of saying it. So she will come to be in your service. meeyād khedmatetoon 

Vijay: meeyād khedmatetoon 

Leyla: And then he calls her, he goes seemeen 

Vijay: seemeen 

Leyla: And then he goes beeyā 

Vijay: beeyā 

Leyla: And this is the informal way of saying come. So the command to come. So seemeen beeyā, Simin come. So he's not using the formal, come or formal words with his wife. seemeen, beeyā 

Vijay: seemeen, beeyā 

Leyla: āghā vō khānomé moravati Mr. and Mrs. Moravati. So āghā, sir, Mr. khānom, Mrs. And then their last name is Moravati. So āghā vō khānomé moravati 

Vijay: āghā vō khānomé moravati 

Leyla: And then tashreef ovordan. Again, he ends it with they have graced us with their presence. tashreef ovordan

Vijay: tashreef ovordan

Leyla: So he ends it. So it's funny, like they keep these phrases keep coming up throughout this dialogue. They keep upping the tārof. And I kind of want to do a little bit of a recap of these before we listen to the whole thing again. Let's go over all of our tārof phrases. One is safā ovordeen 

 Vijay: safā ovordeen 

Leyla: So you've brought a fresh air. You've brought a wonderful sense with you. safā ovordeen 

Vijay: safā ovordeen 

Leyla: And then bé lotfetoon 

Vijay: bé lotfetoon 

Leyla: Due to your thanks. Thanks to you. bé lotfetoon 

Vijay:  bé lotfetoon 

Leyla: And then eftekhār dādeen, you have given pride ekhteeyār dāreen 

Vijay: ekhteeyār dāreen

Leyla:  tashreef ovordeen, you have graced us with your presence, you have come with your presence. tashreef ovordeen 

Vijay: tashreef ovordeen 

Leyla: ekhteeyār dāreen 

Vijay: ekhteeyār dāreen

Leyla: And this just means, oh, no, no, no, downplaying it and saying, no, no, no, that's not, that's not the case. And then, manzelé khodetoon-é 

Vijay: manzelé khodetoon-é 

Leyla: And of course, befarmāyeed

Vijay: befarmāyeed 

Leyla: befarmāyeed means please go ahead. And manzelé khodetoon-é means it is your home. And then lotf dāreen 

Vijay: lotf dāreen 

Leyla: And that is you have kindness. 

Vijay: Yeah! You have great or kindness or generosity. 

Leyla: Yes. And then, tashreef nadāran 

Vijay: tashreef nadāran 

Leyla: She's not here? She's not graced us with her presence? And then at the end tashreef ovordan 

Vijay: tashreef ovordan 

Leyla: And they have graced us with their presence. So yes. So a lot of different tārof phrases in this. So we're going to listen to it again at three-quarter speed and see if you can listen to and understand all of the words. 

āghāyé shibāni: salām, khosh āmadeen, safā ovordeen. 

āghāyé moravati: salām, hāletoon chetor-é? 

āghāyé shibāni: khoob-am, shomā chetor-een? 

khānomé moravati: khaylee mamnoon. khoob-eem, bé lotfetoon. 

āghāyé shibāni: befarmāyeed, befarmāyeed too. vāgh'an eftekhār dādeen tashreef ovordeen. 

āghāyé moravati: ekhteeyār dāreen.

āghāyé shibāni: befarmāyeed tooyé otāghé nesheeman. har jā rāhateen besheeneen. manzelé khodetoon-é. 

khānomé moravati: khaylee mamnoon, lotf dāreen. hameenjā rāhat-eem. khānom tashreef nadāran? 

āghāyé shibāni: cherā! seemeen alān meeyād khedmatetoon… seemeen, beeyā āghā vō khānomé moravati tashreef ovordan! 

Leyla: Okay. And there's the end of the dialogue. Anything else that you want to point out, Vijay, before we wrap up?

Vijay: Absolutely. So there are just a few phrases where actually we kind of have some expressions that are a little similar in English as well. So, for example, manzelé khodetoon-é is basically like saying make yourself at home. Like, you know, think of this house as your own house. It's your own house. And just act like you were there. You know, no need to be especially formal or anything. And also, khānom tashreef nadāran is basically saying, like, you know, a polite way of asking, like, where is your wife? You know, and saying, maybe we translate it as, is your wife home? So, like, kind of hinting at the fact that, you know, the wife hasn’t been seen yet, and just asking where she is. And, yeah. And also at the very end, he says āghā vō khānomé moravati. So, you know, he is, the pronunciation is maybe a little bit, you know, informal and very specific to how people speak in Tehran. But, he's still being very, very formal. And, you know, saying that these people, tashreef ovordan, they've come, they've brought their honor, and he just wants to keep it very formal with them. 

Leyla: Yeah. Wonderful. Great observations and good find for the dialogue for this week. These are all really important, especially if you're going to go to someone's house. You can't just go and, you see, there's a lot of dancing that's happening back and forth with these people to get their point across, and to finally go sit down at this party. A lot needs to happen before you can just go sit. And we'd actually brought up the phrase yavāsh, yavāsh before, slowly, slowly. And that is the theme of Iranian culture. It's yavāsh, yavāsh, slowly, slowly you get to go inside the house. There's a process and steps for everything that we do. 

Vijay: Absolutely, yavāsh, yavāsh.

Leyla: So good to keep in mind. Well, thank you so much for this lesson. And we'll be back with another dialogue series for lesson 67. So we hope to see you there. Thank you, Vijay jān.

Vijay: khaylee mamnoon az shomā 

Leyla: and khodāhāfez for now from Leyla. 

Vijay: And bé omeedé deedār from Vijay.